I spent a weekend with a friend of mine, who while normally married with a kid and an otherwise responsible person was without said responsibilities for one weekend. Married guys are crazy.
Day One: Get off work late on friday. Hang out at his house, drink beer and play cards. Drink more beer. Drink more beer. Decide to watch Conan the Barbarian. Every time Conan grunts, we drink. Walk down to local bar (no driving because we are responsible). Drink more beer. Watch aesthetically challenged guitar player pick up tons of older woman admirers with his renditions of Jack Johnson. Drink more beer. Don't remember.
Day Two: Wake up. Watch Horton Hears A Who while Hungover (me, not Horton). Walk down to local coffeeshop. Drink coffee, eat bagel. Discuss last nights adventure. Walk back to his house and commence the drinking of beer again. More beer, more cards. Discuss the pitfalls of diaper changing and time out giving. Drink more beer. Prepare delicious vietnamese beef stew. Watch DVR-recording of Conan the Destroyer. Agree that Barbarian was better. Drink more beer. Commence shotgunning of beer. For every shotgun, Conan movie gets better dialogue. Shotgun more beer. Don't remember.
Day Three: Wake up . Skip movie and walk straight to coffee shop. Drink coffee, eat bagel. Play cards. Discuss the drinking of the beer last night. Discuss important fantasy football strategies. Drink Gatorade mixed with a little gin to get juices flowing. Tackle important chore list. Mount air conditioner while hungover. Climb on ladder and repair side of house while swaying (me and the ladder.) Throw all evidence into recycle container. Find a few beers left in fridge. Drink more beer. Discuss various successes achieved on chore list. Drink more beer...
They say that youth is wasted on the young, and I agree. I finally have the wisdom and maturity to fully appreciate a weekend like this and still be able to function after one. It's like I have reached a middle-aged nirvana. Unfortunately next weekend I'll be back to watching Conan the Destroyer by myself, and he'll be back to changing diapers and giving time outs. But when the stars align, perhaps we'll enjoy another weekend like this.
